RAIN News changes for the bet– well, it changes.

RAIN News is completing an initiative to become a French-language publication. Nobody is more startled than we are.

Asked whether this unexpected change was long in the making, or a reckless attempt at sophistication, RAIN News editor Brad Hill commented, “[RAIN owner] Kurt Hanson kept gesturing at me. His hand movements, while generally bizarre, had a kind of French accent to them. And the man is a known Francophile. Other than that, I’ve got nothing for you.”

We do not accept Hill’s remarks as any kind of explanation.

Still, the new direction is clearly a great step forward in Chicago-France relations. Other geopolitical ramifications have yet to be evaluated. Or really noticed at all.

We reached out to French president Emmanuel Macron, and appealed to the man for some kind of comment. His reply:


“C’est bon… je suppose. Aucune idée de ce dont ils parlent, vraiment.” –Emmanuel Macron


The French leader’s comment could be roughly translated as, “Don’t bother me when I’m listening to Rogan.” But we take the alacrity of his reply to indicate a general approval. Or scandalized disapproval.

Further developments will be announced as they are à venir. But don’t stay up.

Petroleum V. Nasby


  1. J’ai apprécié l’édition du poisson d’avril d’aujourd’hui !

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